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It was only a matter of time before the tsunami of Christmas videos appeared on the horizon and we could not ignore them any longer, so with heartfelt Xmas apologies we have decided to put up the festive decorations and accept the fact that we will all be hearing the sound of jingle bells for the next couple of weeks.

So with that over we move on to our first real Christmas commercial feature for PooPourri (you know, the people who make those smelly toilet sprays and have that catchy ‘Spritz the bowl before-you-GO’ strap line) that features Santa caught short during his big night delivering all those presents. All good so far.

So what does he do? Well, i guess he would do what anyone does in this situation, in a strangers house, in the middle of the night, he heads for the bathroom in search of the porcelain sleigh to drop some yule logs down his chimney. All still good, except if you are releasing the ghost of Christmas arse it would probably be a good idea to close the bathroom door. Still good(ish).

And then without warning a young girl appears and sees the intruder in the bathroom, yep, an old man with his trousers around his ankles in the middle of the night with a strange look on his face. Wait. That’s not right.


Does she scream, run, wake her parents and call 911? Of course not, instead she has a conversation with him while Santa pinches off a hot slice of fruit cake, and if that isn’t bad enough her younger sister appears, followed shortly after by yet another younger sister. This is definitely weird and definitely NOT right!

So lets recap – An intruder in the bathroom, in the dead of night, with his trousers down, in the company of three very young girls—Yes officer, nothing wrong here, move along.

I’m sure it’s meant to be all harmless, a humorous Christmas commercial, full of festive fun, but i can’t shake off the whiff in the air that something smells very rotten in the state of Wonderland. It’s just ‘weird’.

But don’t panic, it all ends well, the three kids blackmail Santa before they leave and the whole thing ends with Santa dropping his motherload while a beautiful young lady (where the hell did she come from?) sits on his knee.

What? I sh#t you not!—Happy Christmas everyone!


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