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Finding true romance online is a difficult path to navigate, but in the case of these people i’m going to put my hand on my heart and promise that none of these people will give you that feeling of ‘love at first swipe’ – If you are a user of Tinder then i can pretty much guess that if any of these images came up on your screen the chances of you swiping right are pretty much zero.

Online dating is all about first impressions, it conveys an all important first-impression to someone looking at your profile page exactly what kind of person they think you are (or you are hoping you to project) so it’s paramount that you get it right.

You might be a multi-millionaire or have the looks of a model, but if something in the photo flags up in your brain that you might be ‘a sandwich short of a picnic’ or ‘a few beers short of a six-pack’ then chances are that initial feeling will never wain.

So get it right first time and whatever you do don’t follow any of the examples below that these poor unfortunates thought, in a moment of madness, would be a great profile picture that would attract the perfect soul-mate. Because everyone knows that crazy only ever attracts crazy.

 

Never post a picture of yourself with a previous girlfriend!
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Color coordination shows you have a good eye for detail, done wrong it can look really creepy.
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Lets face it, only small children are into mermaids…..WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY!?!
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It’s a good idea to have some of your friends in a picture, but only the ones that are still breathing.
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Clever use of distracting patterns around the room takes your attention away from a stupid facial expression.
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A good pose is essential. The one on the left conveys ‘gangster’ – The one on the right conveys ‘insane’
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Your best seductive pose will always be overshadowed by an untidy kitchen.
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It’s true that ‘less is more’, but not when u have a giant’s tie around your neck or a dead fox on your head.
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Think very carefully if you are going to use a bikini photo to attract the perfect partner.
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This is screaming out, “I’m a cold-hearted killer…but i always clean up afterwards”
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Sometimes you might be sending out too many mixed messages that leave people thinking ‘WTF!?’
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Always make sure the photo you are posting is of you, NOT your mom who found your phone in the bathroom.
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Sometimes a nice smile is better than a serious look that says ‘i’m going to kill you!’

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Always choose a neautral background, not one that leaves people thinking ‘i need to buy a carpet like that’

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Pets are sometimes a good addition to a profile picture. Sometimes.

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Never get talked into, “trust me, it’ll look like you are at the beach!’ if you are NOT at a beach!

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Ok, so you have a leg growing out of your shoulder. Nothing wrong here. Move along.

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This is telling me that she either likes being kidnapped, or lives in the trunk of a car.

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If you are not physically attracted to what you are seeing look for other positives. Hey, this guy can write.

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It’s never good to convey to anyone that you might be ‘white trash’.

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I’m not sure what’s scaring me more, the fact he has a gun, or he’s going bald between photos?

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It’s always a good idea to have somewhere to keep your beers cool, but the bikini is a bit overkill.
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Always look on the bright side, at least your bike will be safely locked up when you go on a date.

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Composition is everything. I don’t know why but the pink boots keep taking my gaze towards the microwave.

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‘Hey buddy, i hate to tell you this but you have a spiders web on your head.’

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This girl is either a serial killer, or really handy around the house (not sure about the flames though?)

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Is the guy on the right a guy? Meanwhile the girl on the left has the longest body i’ve ever seen!

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Never pose seductively with a banana if you are wearing stripy socks. Ever.

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You’ll never have to second-guess what this girl likes to drink.

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A woman who keeps a samurai sword in her bedroom is probably best avoided.

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Dude, go and put your mom’s fur coat back in her wardrobe before she finds out.

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Quite possibly the most brilliant way to hide man-bewbs ever!

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